“The mind I love most must have wild places, a tangled orchard where dark damsons drop in the heavy grass, an overgrown little wood, the chance of a snake or two, a pool that nobody fathomed the depth of, and paths threaded with flowers planted by the mind.”
You’re a brilliant, creative woman navigating the deep and sometimes treacherous waters of your art, whether it be visual arts, music, film, television, stage, design, photography or writing; you feel in your heart a yearning for more – more joy, more fulfillment, more peace.
I can help you rediscover your sense of purpose, get crystal clear on what you want, and create a solid plan to get it.
Or you’re a woman whose life and identity have been split apart by trauma or abuse. The first round of healing has occurred, but you feel stuck now; you feel changed, broken, numb.
I can help you reclaim and rebuild a rich and rewarding life; to retrieve what seemed lost, and feel truly, richly alive again.
Here the thing: whatever your situation, and though you may feel you’re at the mercy of your past, your beliefs, your circumstances – you are not, and I can show you how to refocus your life.
I worked for most of my life in film and television, as a producer on documentaries, travel shows, current affairs programs, sitcoms, and dramas.
I also directed various media and arts organizations and a major film festival, and worked as a textile design consultant.
My work really meant everything to me; every choice I made in my life – my friendships, relationships, vacations, the city where I lived – revolved around my career.
I lived in many countries, following a trend that began at birth; I was born in Malta and have three passports, though I was based for most of my life in beautiful Aotearoa, New Zealand.
As an adult I moved often – between countries, relationships, belief systems, seeking something that seemed out of reach to me; a sense of belonging, a sense of knowing who I was and what I truly wanted. Life moved so quickly that often it felt as if I lived on shifting sands.
My childhood had been turbulent, and I grew to believe, as so many of us do, that I was at the mercy of my fears, my history, my shadow.
I spent many years carrying out maneuvers in the campaign against what was within – working against, not with, my deepest, truest self.
In an effort to find meaning in the events of our life, we construct stories for ourselves. Often these stories do not serve us, as we veer away from actual facts into a personal interpretation, which is colored by old suffering, and which predicates new suffering.
In an attempt to heal this suffering, for over a decade I was in therapy, as I continued to work and grow my career.
Then, in 1996, the bottom fell out of my world, when I was the victim of a violent crime that took place at my home in New Zealand. I felt the soul-freezing and body-numbing horror of being powerless while under attack, and believing I would die.
Suddenly nothing much mattered except survival.
Everything fell apart for me. The effects of trauma were pervasive throughout my life. Though I was lucky enough to receive extensive support from both loved ones and professionals, still, looking back, I don’t believe the full effects of this and other traumas were really fully healed within me.
But I thought they had been. Years passed during which I gradually reclaimed the bits and pieces of my shattered identity.
Eventually I moved from New Zealand to New Orleans, Louisiana, where I’ve now lived for fifteen years.
I continued to work in the arts and media and started the deeply soul-satisfying work of volunteering as an advocate with rape survivors.
And yet, something was not working. I still did not have a strong sense of direction or purpose, and my ability to navigate the tangled paths of my life seemed to have failed me.
For the first time in my life, I felt I’d lost my footing, making choices that didn’t serve me, unable to move forward, unable to set a course and stick to it.
What Changed Things?
Gradually I grew to acknowledge that something in me had fundamentally changed, or, more likely, awakened. I needed a new direction, a new perspective, and a new outlook on life.
I realized that my deepest desire and potential for happiness lay in supporting others to heal and grow, as I heal and grow myself.
So in early 2012 I decided to become a life coach, and I’m now a Master Certified Coach, trained by bestselling author Dr. Martha Beck, and an Endorsed Intuitive Energy Reader, trained by the Intuitive Arts Studio.
For most of my life I chose to believe thoughts and beliefs that cast me as victim, as scapegoat, as having no power to determine the course of my life.
Quite honestly, I loved the work I used to do – there was nothing more joyful to me. I just didn’t know how to do it without crashing and burning. I wish someone had helped me to keep doing it; I wish someone had told me “The problem is within you – it’s your thinking that’s the problem, and you can change it.”
Now, I know that I’m the architect of my life, and I have powerful tools that I’ve learned from many brilliant teachers that enable me daily to make choices that enrich my life and bring my dreams back into focus, and have helped me transform dark, tragic events into peace and fulfillment.
By grace, and not alone, I have thawed my soul, regained trust, and brought the knowledge that I dwell in beauty back to my being.
Uncertainty, vulnerability and change are always part of life; but along with them is a sense of deep peace and sureness about my ability to find and follow my path.
Finally, I feel awake to the reality of who I truly am and what I truly want.
I can help you wake up to that too.
If you are a woman who longs to find your desire and intention, and to start living in ways that can actually give you the life you want;
If you are a trauma survivor who has healed the initial wounds and is ready now to create a new and delicious way of being;
If you’re ready to become an active participant in the creation of your life;
Here’s what to do:
Check out how to work with me, here.
Photo credit: Ebet Roberts